| Sucker | Sucker's Role | Sucker's Website | Estimated Cost for Comprable Service by Industry Professional |
| Matt "So Cool" Davis | Said the words "So" and "Cool" on Track 01 | 98 Rock | $50 |
| Chris Abbott | Played a kick-ass guitar aolo on Track 02 | Abstraxt | $500 |
| Steve Lynch | Played 90% of the guitar tracks, including the solo at the end, on Track 09 | Can't Hang | $750 |
| Luke Mysko | Sang fantastic lead vocals on Track 09 | Can't Hang | $1000 |
| Jasan Stepp | Beautiful cello quartet on Track 03 | Dog Fashion Disco | $500 |
| Mike Bulmash, Joe Feinour, Jim Mehrtens, and Christian Rivera | Went hoarse screaming "I'm Free" on Track 06 | February Falling | $400 |
| Jim Mehrtens | Proclaimed his pension for "Cutting it Loose" on Track 01 | February Falling | $50 |
| Greg Plummer | Growled "In the Sheets" over a speaker phone from Maine for Track 05 and Track 10 | N/A | $100 |
| Clint Moore | Hit a cowbell with a stick for a few minutes | Minus-One | $250 |
| Dowdee McCracken | Rocked "Dancin'" on Track 05 and Track 10 | Opposable Thumbs | $100 |
| Frank Magnesi, Mat McManus, and Sean Moore | Said and screamed all sorts of weird shit on Track 07 | Ramrod | $100 |
| Tim Johnson and Billy Martin | Did some fine "Cut Footloose" chanting and screaming about Kevin Bacon (and other things) on Track 01 | The Big Hurt | $200 |
| Neil Tevault | Played Trombone on Track 02 and Track 04 | N/A | $500 |
| Ben Allred, Alex Crowley, Evan Sarli, and John Smith | Did every other job imaginable related to the creation of this CD | You in it, foo' | $50,000 |
